重新出发 Begin Again

2024年，我在准备毕业作品时，和伙伴一起建立了一个网站。

一个关于幸福Happiness，用一对一采访+摄影作品的网站。

可惜的是。当时没有选择购买Ghost这样帮助建立网站的公司的产品，而是请设计团队帮我们搭建了一个网页，这使得各项操作都没有那么方便。在毕业展结束后，那个网站也就逐渐被遗忘了。

如今已经是2026年，我还在泰国。

今天是2026年的大年三十，蛇年马上过去，马年即将到来。我选择在这一天重新出发 begin again。我的24岁是充满挑战和磨难的一个本命年。中国人都有一个共识，本命年是需要更加格外小心的。幸好，我的本命年马上就要有惊无险地过完了。

前几天我在微博上写道：其实本命年经历的最大的磨难是分手谈了三年的恋爱。但是想想觉得如果这件事把我本命年的灾难都挡了，也挺值的。现在回归单身生活的我非常幸福，很繁忙，但很幸福。我的黄金十年开始了。只为我自己的日子。

确实是这样的，当我把大部分时间精力放在感情上的时候，会很大程度上放弃一部分的向内求。我似乎和自己没有那么熟悉了，似乎没有那么多的时间去表达，去记录，去展现自我。我为此感到焦虑却又没有重新开始的动力。

直到今年，我进入研究生的第二个学期，我忽然间惊觉自己不知不觉中有了很多的资源，很多平台，很多能力甚至很多工作机会。我拿到了奖学金，我的生活更加宽裕了；我接了一些赚钱的小工作，我更有选择的权力了；我买了车，我的活动半径更加拓宽了···

一切的一切让我想要正视自己的生活，把能量拿回来，然后··· 我要重新开始。重新建立一份自己的天地。

2026年，会是很好的一年。

English ver.

In 2024, while preparing for my graduation project, a partner and I built a website together.
It was a project about Happiness — a site composed of one-to-one interviews and photographic works.

Unfortunately, at the time we didn’t choose a platform like Ghost to build it ourselves.
Instead, we asked a design team to develop a custom website.
As a result, everything was difficult to manage and update.
After the graduation exhibition ended, the website slowly faded into neglect.

Now it is already 2026, and I am still in Thailand.

Today is Lunar New Year’s Eve.
The Year of the Snake is ending, and the Year of the Horse is about to begin.
I decided to begin again on this day.

In Chinese culture, the year that matches your zodiac sign — the Ben Ming Nian — is believed to be a year that requires extra caution.
My 24th year, my own zodiac year, has been full of challenges and difficulties.
Fortunately, it is about to pass without real disaster.

A few days ago I wrote on Weibo:
the greatest hardship of my zodiac year was the end of a three-year relationship.
But thinking about it now, if that single event absorbed all the misfortune of the year, it was worth it.

Back in a single life, I feel very happy.
Busy — but happy.
My golden decade has begun.
Time that belongs only to me.

When I devoted most of my time and energy to a relationship, I gave up a large part of turning inward.
I became less familiar with myself.
I had less time to express, to record, to present who I was.
I felt anxious about it, yet lacked the momentum to start again.

Until this year — my second semester of graduate school —
I suddenly realized that, almost without noticing, I now had many resources, platforms, abilities, and even work opportunities.

I received a scholarship, and life became more secure.
I took on paid projects, and gained the power to choose.
I bought a car, and my radius of movement expanded.

All of this made me want to face my life directly,
to take my energy back,

and to start again —
to build a space of my own.

2026 will be a good year.